This is what happen

To some of you who dont know yet, Charles and I been friends since December of 2002. I've mentioned from my previous post how far are we in our relationship and striving the so-called long distance love affair. Honestly, this kind of situation is killing me day by day. It aint that easy, in fact its the hardest situation that lovers will take. Today, my paranoia strikes again, and i hate it when i feel that way. I dont know why but sometimes i tend to think negative things though i prayed harder for this relationship, still some dirty thoughts sinked into my mind. Am i too paranoid? the answer is YES! Couple of times he told me that this month will be one of the busiest month in his job, but when i called and he dont answer after my numerous calls, i got really mad that i couldnt help to stop it. I easily got pissed off when in just one day i cant talked to him. I know we've been into a lot of things, from tough one, from difficult times and hardest days that we've experienced and passed through, and yet, this time around, its like im pulling myself out from this situation just so because he couldnt answer my Damn Call! (what a thought Fyrnz?!?!)

What will i do? I frankly don't know. Or is this just one of my times that i wanted to be cared of for i felt bored in my fuckin cell? You see, i literally am enjoying myself staying in the house for i know i have to, or shall i say i force myself to enjoy it cause i dont have any choice. I know this whole thing will just pass and i may not notice im back on track again, like kicking my butt in a busy accounting job in a corporate world and to overcome the long distance love affair for we will soon be together. But to heck thinking those with this current situation that im dealing right now. ARGH! i want to bang my head in this wall that is right next to me just so to be awake.

Im just venting out my so pathetic mind. Hope you wont mind me sharing my day to you and i hope you had a great day ahead.

Ciao for now.